Month: May 2009

  • Kids these days!

    Greg was watching something on TV about tribal initiation rituals. In Papua, New Guinea, teenage boys are initiated into manhood through an interesting custom. During a huge feast, the men in the village are able to swallow a two foot long vine into the bottom of their stomach, then pull it out again. The vines are very rough, and some boys even die from internal bleeding if they not able to do it correctly.

    The boys are assured that when they are able to swallow the vine, the rewards will be great. The boys told the camera, "When I am a man, I will be able to take care of my parents, build fences and watch the pigs."

    Wow! See that's the problem with American kids these days. I told Greg that if he went into the back yard and swallowed a two foot stick, I'd let him build a fence. Apparently we've been doing it wrong. Instead of nagging kids to clean their rooms or take out the trash, we should be saying, "When you are a man, you will be able to do your chores and take care of me!"

    This kind of reminds me of Tom Sawyer. How much will you give me if I let you whitewash the fence?

    So for all you parents out there, now you know the secret to successful child raising!

  • Why yes, this is pretty much what it's like to work in computer tech support

  • Accordians

    An accordion player is driving home late one night after playing a concert. He's tired and hungry so he stops at an all-night diner for a bite to eat.

    Halfway through his meal he realizes that although he locked his car doors, his accordion is in the back seat, in plain sight!

    He rushes out to his vehicle but he is too late. The windows are already smashed and someone has thrown in two more accordions.

    harhar

  • Irony

    I was given a business card this week. The bottom line said, "Excellence Guarenteed". Sigh.