Month: April 2006

  • A pastor prayed to the Lord God, "Lord, I do't know what to do. 95% of the people in this town are beyond redemption. It is a stuggle to live here."

    God replied, "I'll get back to you." And the Lord sent down an angel to take a survey to determine if what the pastor said was true.

    The angel returned with the news that the pastor was being kind in his report, the people were much worse than he had said, and that indeed 95% of the people were worse than those who brought down the destruction of Sodom. God declared, "Those 5% who are holding fast to the righteousness must be encouraged. I will send them each a letter."

    Do you know what the letter said.....

    Oh, I'm sorry. Would you like to see my copy?

  • This was on my daily Philadelphia Eagles calendar (last year's Christmas gift from a co-worker) for Wednesday April 18th:

    "When artificial turf was installed in Franklin Field [the Eagles' former stadium] in 1969, groundskeepers had to clear the field of thousands of dead grasshoppers before the first game there. The insects had mistaken the fake turf for the real thing!" 

    Pretty weird, huh? Just remember, you heard it here first!


  • Quick and Easy $$$$$$
     
    Do you want to make some quick $$$$$$. It's easy, with little or no effort involved. Think of all the things you could do with some free $$$$$$. Don't wait! Who knows how long this opportunity will last!

    Here's what to do. Open Microsoft Word or some other text editor (even Xanga editor!). Hold down your shift key and hit the #4 button six times.

    There, you've made your own quick and easy $$$$$$!

    Good job!!

  • So why does anyone actually pay for a haircut when his beloved and wonderful wife will cut his hair for free?!  


    And then the big clean up ...

    Yes, she is vacuuming my ear!

    Married life is great!